When you’re trying to agree with your former spouse on a custody schedule, you’re probably mostly thinking about the day-to-day scheduling and arrangements. Travelling and vacations aren’t something that happen all the time, so it can be difficult to try and make a custody arrangement for them. With the holiday season upon us, here’s what co-parents need to know to help make the holidays as enjoyable and stress-free as possible for everyone.
Vacations need to be part of the schedule
Now there can’t really be two Christmases or two birthdays, but each holiday and vacation does need to be put into the schedule especially if parents share custody. It’s very possible that vacation with one parent may overlap into time with the other, so it will be up to the parents to determine how that time will be made up (or if it will be) and what that looks like for other holidays or vacations.
Work together
When it comes to sharing custody, each parent’s vacation schedule and ability could look different. Depending on their jobs or careers, some parents will have a lot of vacation time whereas others may have only minimal time off or limited flexibility as to when they can take their vacation. It would be best for the children if parents can work together so that each will get the most out of their vacation time with their children. Working together will give your children the greatest benefit and the most amount of time with each parent.
Planning is crucial
There are the big holidays – like Christmas – every year, but also smaller ones and school breaks as well. Take some time, maybe at the beginning of each year, and talk to your former spouse to plan out what each of the holidays is going to look like this year. If your children spent Christmas as your home this year, then maybe next time they will spend it with the other parent and their family. Additionally, summer vacation and spring break – what will these look like? Take some time to plan out what each of the holidays is going to look like, and agree on it, so each parent can plan their holidays and vacation accordingly.
Set rules (and abide by them)
Each parent’s idea of a vacation could be different: one wants to spend it at the cottage and the other wants to go to an all-inclusive beach resort. Both parents need to know and agree on where their children are going to be while spending time with the other parent. If one parent has stated they are not comfortable with their children leaving the country (due to age, possibly) then the other parent needs to respect that.
Also, if you have stated that you don’t want your children participating in a certain activity with the other parent do not go ahead and do it on your own. You need to abide by the same rules and stick to the agreed upon boundaries.
Co-parenting can be a little difficult to work out at first, but it’s important to remember you are doing what is in the best interest of your children so that they get the most time with each parent.
Contact Marcy Segal Law today
If you truly cannot agree on vacation schedules, you may benefit from the help of a family lawyer. Contact us today to learn more.